I don't know what to do now... ok.. so this is gonna be one of my more serious posts... but i'm only human rite?!

it's not so much of a dilemma coz i don't really have much of a choice... i guess.. because of the way life is, my life in particular... there's no choice... wish there was though... now, i really agree with derek's msn nick... it says something like i've been so caught up in doing things for people that i've lost myself completely... actually, now, i'm not too sure about it myself... it might be just me creating all these problems for myself... but then again, i think i just have too many things to do... but i can't exactly prioritise everything coz to me, everything's important... ok.. so i'm beginning to mix you up...

let's put it this way... i've got school... i've got work... i've got bowling... i've got church commitments... and of course, things i want to do... like... spend time with alpha... with my friends like esta n also da babies in school... and more importantly, get some rest for myself...

what i really really really really wanna do now is go for the Jeremy Monteiro & The Chicago Connection... It's a jazz thing if u don't know... but yeah.. the problem is that they're only on for 2 nites.. fri and sat nite... but sadly, i've gotta work on fri nite and sat nite has been book by da mission team to prepare for missions week... i really wanna go!!!!!!! sigh... but it's not like i can not go for the missions thing... argh.... sad...

oh well.. forgot what else i wanna talk about... *sigh*

ok... since my last post on wednesday..... i've... umm.... oh...... now i remember...

thursday was normal in school... den i hung around... and i went down to work at marina.... was super tired... think i got ari, edwin n abdullah quite freaked out... haha... so.. da good news is... i doubt i'm working next wk.. haha.. they all agree that i should get some rest...

den fri... i skipped school!! so cool rite?! haha.. but that's not the point... was juz plain tired... and also... spent some time with alpha larh... haha.. i poor thing... he poor thing oso... he poor thing coz he seldom come out.. i poor thing coz i got no free time... haha... ok... nvm... i juz want a break larh... hmm... so yeah.. he just HAD to kick me out of bed at 9 plus for breakfast... cannot tahan him manz... yup.. in da afternoon, went to watch a lot like love... nice show... den after that, i had to work again.. n he had to entertain himself... went to da arcade... went walk walk... joined me for dinner... went walk summore... den went to play lan and stayed til i finished at 12.45am... so sweet rite?!?!?! haha... i know u're all jealous... haha... okok... i'm mad... but yeah.. he's really sweet... wad more can i ask for??

today... was utter rubbish... really utter rubbish... it's really amazing how idiotic some people can be... but nvm.. that's over... shall not rub it in... i think i've more or less gotten over it anyway... but yeah.. crowd was good for NP open... 67 peeps i believe... da crap part was that my ave really drop a lot.. coach says it's coz my ball dun match da lane condition... and of course.. i din see alpha coz of bowling... and this wk, he's in camp liao...

anyway, enuff about that larh.. after the game... wanted to drill ball but uncle richard busy.. so i'll get it done sometime this week... yup... and also... went to carraige bar.. my first time there.. quite a nice place.. but yeah.. really quite a lot of old people.. and old songs too... but nice larh.. and early in da nite, got karaoke but not much smoke... and from 9 plus... got live band performing.. den can dance... so cool... i like to dance.. think it's cool.. but not the clubbing type of dance.. da more defined type.. that has proper steps... yeah... haha...

now i'm home... i got a few assignments to do still.. but.............. heh... and time's not waiting for me either.. haha.. ok... enuff said.

i'm now being forced to update this... by my dearest saleha... haha... okok.. that's not it... juz that my update has been long overdued... yup... been very busy... lots of assignments for class and lots of projects for bowling... anyway.... hmm.. gosh.. i can't even remember when i last updated this... i believe it was some time last wk larh... lazy to open another page juz to check...

it's another boring day in school... and i'm freezing... no.. i'm not mad... and no.. singapore's not snowing either... it's juz this freaking room where i'm having my programming lesson in... and also... my inhuman classmates... say it's hot and stuffy in the room... heh... total madness i tell u...

anyway, teen games is finally over... that's one thing of my back... hurray to the guys for beating a lot of people younger than them.. haha.. ok.. so i'm being sacarstic... but who cares... they know it too... and so does uncle richard (coach)... haha... big bullies.... it was fun larh... one team came in first... da other third.... and they won da guys high game and guys high series too... ok.. i shall shut up... hmm... i'll try to post photos online if they dun turn out fuzzy....

besides that, i'm really kind of frustrated with some people... dun wanna name names... but they're really annoying... it's like... can't people in this world think of others before themselves?? it's always i, me and myself... heh.. hate that type of people.... i shall stop here before it becomes too obvious as to who i'm talking about...

on my list of things to do now.... basically, a lot...

Assignments
1) webmastering
2) graphic design fundamentals
3) database
4) photography

Bowling
5) Submit CCA points for teen games and the coming NP Open
6) Start planning for 9 pin tap
7) Pick up trophies
8) Make sure booth is ok
9) Get the comm down for NP Open earlier
10) Get new bowling ball!

Work
11) Just work lor... 2 shifts a week... one tmr nite.. n one fri nite.. but i dun think fri nite got
people can take over.... *sobz*

Others
12) remember to eat amidst everything
13) remember to sleep as well
14) remember to remember all the above

I think that's about it.... but i'm not too sure... haha.. will udate more if i remember... tata.. for now, i'm juz looking forward to dismissal... not becoz it's my last class for today already... coz i have to stay back to complete da photography thingy... and hang around da booth... sian larh... haha.. nvm.. da point is that i get to eat! yummy!!! *rubs tummy* haha... hungry!!! me hungry! i want food!!! now!!!! okok... tata... i think this post is long enuff...

i juz got back from work about 30 minutes ago... nice and squeaky clean now... and i really should be doing my school work... but i can't help but come online to unwind for awhile.... life's been pretty busy.. ok.. so it's been very busy... i guess i'm learning to live with it... but i think my body won't be able to take a whole lot more of this shit... dunno larh.. see how... see wad happens... coz i love all of wad i do... ok larh.. so i like to complain a lil here and there.. but i still enjoy everything...

hmm... ohhhh.. went out with esta on wed.... did a lil shopping.. and a lot of pigging out... haha... and by da time i got back and had my shower at 7 plus... i intended to laze around on my bed.. and after awhile, i juz fell asleep.. heh.. yes... i'm that tired... a lot of things are different now... i used to be very care free... juz going for training... and minding my own business... as for da rest of my days... juz go school and go home... and go out... heh... come to think about it, i kind of miss that life... now, i'm not quite sure wad i do.. haha.. i'm always up and about... oh well....

hmm.... thursday......... oh.. finished at 3... went to queensway with 6 guys... derek, arthur, lionel, kenneth, weijie and nicholas... yup... they went to shop.. but seriously... da guys who originally intended to shop left the place with nothing.. and those that didn't intend to shop, bought stuff... haha.. yup.. quite crazy dunch u think... den after that.. went to bum at weijie's house for awhile while derek went home to bathe.. and pick davin up... hmm... i juz realised that the chicken chop at victors is quite nice.. haha.. after bowling there for so long.. i never really tried it til last nite... it was quite good.. haha.. but da game after that........ hmm.. different story... wasn't good.... below expectations... sigh... oh well...

i think i shall stop here... tata....

i'm back to update once again... haha.. i better... otherwise people will think that i dropped dead somewhere.. hahahahaa.... not surprising... dun be surprised if u really see me on da front cover of some paper.. haha... now.. i'm kind of in da state of exhaustion... yup... but i'm still alive... haha.. oh well... wadeva i have to do still has to be done... Am tired.. and can't really be bothered to say more... catcha up with all of u again when i find da strength... ciao..

i'm now yawning my head off... hmm.. ok.. overstatement.. it's still quite firmly attached... anyway, as u can tell, i'm damn bored rite now.... having a programming practical lesson.... love these practicals... da tutor juz writes the whole program on her own laptop n we all juz follow wad she writes... heh.. how boring can life get rite?? anyway, this is one module i can never grasp the meaning of until a week or 2 before exams.. haha.. oh well...

ok.. so yesterday.. for the first time, i din have anything i had to do after school.. so i met up with my dear esta... n we went to eat our yong tau fu.. haha... explains the tag doesn't it.. haha.. yup.. we used to do it 3-4 times a week last time when i wasn't so busy... her too i guess... heh.. i dunno... anywayz... enjoyed my ytf as usual.. haha.. den after that, went to get swensons ice-cream!! yummy... haha.. i'm such a glutton... but i like sweet stuff... be it sweets or chocolates or ice cream or local desserts... oohhh.. yummy... i'm getting myself hungry now...

the good thing is that class finishes in about 45 minutes time.. and den... i've got no more lessons for today! woohoO!!! i'll be going to BTP(bukit timah plaza) for a nice lunch with my class girls.. haha.. pizza!! yummy.. haha..boy.. i'm really such a piggy... oh well.. i dun really care larh.. haha. i think i'm stressed enuff to be able to maintain my weight and size.. i think.. i hope... haha.. *shrugx*

ok.. this part... may seem like a total shock... i'll get right to the point larh k?! haha...

i think... i like.................................. or am starting to like......................
aiyah.. or should i say.. have gotten over hating green... haha... i kind of figured long ago that i can never fully avoid the colour... as everyone knows.. our lil country here's aka green city... heh.. sooo many trees and plants... haha.. yup.. but i think after about 1.5 yrs of not wearing green, i think i'm quite ok with the colour larh.. haha.. and... no... i haven't gone mad... neither am i sick.. haha.. i juz kind of figured that my wardrobe's getting quite boring ( i think some of u might beg to differ) ... i lack colour in my life... haha... oh well... oh.. n i like my starbucks apron... although i prefer edwin's... haha... *grinx* (it's black.. he's da store manager...) so cool rite?! haha.. ok.. i'm being damn lame... oh well.. that's all for now... tata

why do people always say... have a great week??? how would they know wad shit you're going thru... sigh... so i'm juz feeling damn frustrated now... but i really can't take this shit no more... da only day where i thought i could get a day off.. has now been officially destroyed... meaning, i was supposed to be able to disappear from training on sat... but now, coz of da committee meeting.. i don't really have a choice do i??? i don't have a decent day off... everyday... if it's not school, it's work.. if it's not work, it's tutoring my cousins.. if i do get a day off from all that, surprise surprise....... guess what spoils my close to perfect day... bowling... heh.. it's not that i don't love the sport, infact, i have always loved the sport.. and i still love it... juz that da planning.. da organizing.. and everything else is driving me mad... the fact that guys can't meet people (strangers) by themselves... or for that fact, call a supplier and talk to the person over the phone is quite disgusting... wait a sec.. quite is definately an understatement... yup... it way way way extremely disgusting... wad's happening to da guy race?? can't they do a simple job instead of squirm and try to push da job to others... if u can't communicate with people.. den how do u expect to be in a comm to hold people together... to communicate ideas and to carry out plans?!?!?! argh.. pissed....

it's a sunday nite... and.. he's back in camp again...
so what if he came out this afternoon?? not like the govt cares...

anyway, that's not the point now...
the point it...

me has no idea what me is here for...
me has a million and one things to do...
me has to put up with a lot of shit from alot of different people...
me is pissed and frustrated...
me is tired and needs sleep...
me has no choice coz me's not given one...
me has summarized everything...
me has said my peace...
me is going back to do da shit...

it's me again.. this time.. i'm not in school.. i'm sitting at my desk... eating a muffin... chatting with a friendand settling some bowling stuff... that's now.. before this, i was playing worms again.. haha... it's an addictive game.. and it's so cute!!! anyway, i realise that now, my life has seriously been nothing but packed with a lot of stuff... if it's not school, it's work, when it's neither... like at night, it's bowling stuff... talking stuff out with people... quarrelling with people... stuff like that... sending emails... replying stuff... hmm.. if it's not bowling, it's tutoring cousins... or... church stuff... out of my whole schedule... i think 3 impt things are missing.. i'm not saying that what i do is not impt... it's juz that... i really can't rank what is most impt to what is least... coz i think everything is juz as impt in one way or another... hmm... definately hafta find da time to spend with friends, family... and alphonsus... ( he gets pissed too ya noe...) aiyah.. i really gotta sort out my schedule.. and worst part is.. i gotta find time to revise work too... haha... gosh.. and there's this cricket outside.. driving me mad i tell u... has been outside for da past 2 nites or so... and it's annoying x 100... heh.. or maybe more.. but it's juz really giving me a headache larh.. infact, i'm wondering how i can tahan so long... haha.. da most tragic part is that i can't find da blardy noisy creature... heh.. otherwise he'd be squashed by now... hahahahaha... oh well.. tata...

okok.. told u i'd be updating this more frequently... haha... anyway, finished da first of 2 lessons for today... actually.. i finished my work about 30 mins ago.. but was doing some stuff... yup.. so gotta wait another 25 minutes to go for da next class... heh... haha... anyway, it's quite boring now... school's firewall doesn't really work on messenger 7.0... it's a sometimes yes sometimes no thingy... haha... hmm... besides that... quite sick of long breaks... yup... haha... can't think of anything to say for now.. so i'm off to play worms.. haha.. tata