who are YOU living life for?

You only get one chance at it.. and.. by right, it's entire yours to make or to break.. it has a habit of tossing you around.. bringing you sky high, and pulling you deep down.. you can never take wad's past back.. neither can you manipulate things to make them turn out exactly the way you want them to..

that's life in a nutshell ain't it?

i've always believed that no matter what you do, never regret anything. think this was mentioned a few posts back. my point for this post is not to repeat myself but more to make known what the meaning of life is for me. (i can't speak for the majority can i? hah! that'd be pure bias-ness)

anyway, at this point in life, i'm not sure of the specifics. but i've got a general idea of what i wanna achieve, where i wanna be, how long i'm intending to give myself. somethings like "dreamjob" are still quite blurry. but other than that, i'm quite sure i know that i need enough cash to take care of myself and my family. the existing one and the one i know i want in the future.. i know i wanna settle down.. hmm.. u get the pic?!

what i can say is i'm figuring things out step by step.. i may not know everything now, but i'm sure i'll be able to do it. i've never regretted anything.. well, not really la.. nothing that major or life-changing... and after the longest time, i'm sure my cousin will agree with me that i'm standing up for myself or at least i'm learning to instead of having my life being controlled like a puppet.

i guess in life, some people wanna go back in time to do things differently.. i juz wish people don't expect me to live out their dream life just becoz they missed out on their chance to do so.. can't they get the hint that i'm not them? as much as i love them to bits, and as much as i hate to admit it, they're saying and doing a lot of stuff coz to them, it's for my own good. but com'on... i am my own being. i was born with the exact things they were born with. a body, a spirit, a brain. hah! what makes them think they'd know me better? maybe from a third person's perspective, u do see things that the first person doesn't see. but still, can they really read thru my emotions? wish they would stop assuming. hope they'd stop being so fake. on top of being sincere and honest, why must they put other criterias that can actually be done without? i wanna live life for me. not for them. not their dream life. their dream education or their dream relationship.. sure.. i know i sound selfish don't i? but what happens at the end of the day when they pass on and i'm left? by that time, all my effort would have ended there and then. i'd have nothing left if i lived for them would i?!

sigh. i'm not angry per say, i'm just royally tired and frustrated with everything happening. I wish all this would juz stop. i'm honestly all out of ideas to try and make things better. ending up juz putting up with all the shit that gets thrown my way (close to a weekly basis. if i can really go thru one wk w/o any rubbish, it'd be a miracle in itself). thankfully enough, he's willing to pull thru all this crap with me.. still an incentive to keep going.

True to the name....

true to the name boobrain.. aka.. scatterbrain.. heh..

this morning.. woke up late for a lunch appt.. washed up. changed.. and left.. out of the house, i realised i forgot my watch and my earrings.. (essentials.. things i never leave home w/o.. haha..)
din have time to turn back.. so in a way, felt naked the whole afternoon...

i left the house this evening with my mom.. but we were heading in different directions.. while walking down da stairs, i realised i'd forgotten my phones.. so i told her to go ahead first.. and i went back to get it.. din waste too much time back home. juz picked it up and left again.. walked out to the bus stop.. flagged the bus.. dug for my wallet.. and realised i'd left that at home too.. so wad to do.. can't do without wallet.. so went back home to grab it... wasted so much time... heh.. lucky wasn't in a hurry..

nell cancelled.. so changed out of my jeans into my shorts.. and came down to my normal hangout- SB-TP. Came down.. chilled out awhile.. switched my laptop on.. and realised i forgot to bring my wireless modem.. heh.. lucky thing there's wireless@SG...

so yes.. that's been my scatterbrained day.. hah!

actually, glad i remembered all this happened. like my mom always tells me, if my head wasn't on my shoulders, i'd lose my head too!

Experiences

No matter what happens in life.. Be it good or bad... Never regret it. Treasure it, experience it, learn from it, then move on.

That's a fact of life!